Thank G_d for Bill O’Reilly

I assume that if you are reading this you are anti-war. I'm sure that we are all actively fighting against the war on christmas. But even the most committed crusader can get overwhelmed during the holiday, I mean CHRISTmas season. You're wiped out, you're tired, you're running around shopping and spending time with our families and spouses (NOT with our “partners” “significant others” etc.) Who has the time or energy to keep track of where people stand on the war? Luckily, the prestigious, meticulous investigative reporter Bill O’Reilly finds the truth so that we don't have to.

(Christmas has passed, but you can use this as a guide for Christmas next year-- if the holiday is still around-- and for every day shopping.)

The brave anti-spin pro-Christmas journalist tells us which stores refuse to say Merry Christmas and insist on saying Happy Holidays or even Seasons Greetings. This is Bill’s warning of where such godless advertising can lead

[B]ecause if you look at what happened in Western Europe and Canada, if you can get religion out, then you can pass secular progressive programs, like legalization of narcotics, euthanasia, abortion at will, gay marriage, because the objection to those things is religious-based, usually.

Which is why we must support stores with Merry Christmas signs and picket in front of, divest from, and shut down stores with less Christian greetings.

O’Reilly lays out the methodology behind his study: “We continue our reporting on which American stores are using "Christmas" in advertising this Christmas season and which are not.”
O’Reilly divides the stores into two categories: “using” and “not using” the word Christmas. If stores do not respond to O’Reilly’s inquiry, they are placed in the “not using category”

So far, here's the list. OK, using -- you can see JCPenney's, Macy's, Bloomingdale's, Dillard's. Not using, there they are. Now, Kohl's, still giving us a hard time, but their advertising has been all "Happy Holidays" so I don't know what they want. The company says the clerks are free to say "Merry Christmas." Yeah, OK, that's nice. Again, this investigation is designed to spotlight retailers who have knocked the word "Christmas" out of the Christmas season. We're not too interested with the word "merry." Don't really care about "merry."

Especially scary is the revelation that toy stores are “not using.” We are dealing with an enemy that is so sick and perverse it is trying to take Christmas away from the Children:

“On the toy store front, here's what we found out. Toys "R" Us simply is not going to answer our questions, so we assume that means they're not using "Merry Christmas." Not using for sure, KB Toys and FAO Schwarz.

In summary, we CAN and MUST shop at
JCPenney's, Macy's, Bloomingdale's, Dillard's

We CANNOT and MUST NOT shop at
Kohl's
Toys "R" Us
KB Toys
FAO Schwarz

But if you’re really in a crunch, shop at FAO Schwarz before Toys R Us and KB toys because at least “FAO Schwarz says that their people in the store can shout "Merry Christmas" as loud as they want.”

If you really want to put your money where your mouth is and support Christmas as well as a pro-Christmas martyr/ warrior, you can always shop at the O’Reilly Store (AKA The O’Reilly Christmas store, during Christmas)at http://www.billoreilly.com/store
That way you’re defending two things endangered species being hunted down by gay Jewish liberal secularists: Christmas and Straight White Men.

At the on-line O’Reilly store you’ll find great gifts like the No-Spin MiroFiber jacket, No Spin polo,
The O’Reilly Factor Tote bag, and the must-have “What say you” t-shirt. The “Spin Stops Here Tin filled with soft mint puffs” is sure to please.
If you’re shopping for someone with a sense of humor be sure to get them the hysterical “don’t be a pinhead” bumper sticker. And if you’re shopping for an entire family why not buy a hat set with a “no Spin Dad” hat for dad and a “No Spin Grandpa” from gramps. Unfortunately, there are no “No Spin mom” or “No Spin Grandma” hats, but chances are they’d prefer a tote bag or the soft pint puffs.

Need to shop for the kids? No problem. They’ll love the Bill O’Reilly Jigsaw puzzle, and they’ll love getting tucked into a Spin stops here fleece blanket. And the youth go crazy over The O’Reilly Factor for Kids, especially autographed hardcover copies.

When ordering for the kids, make sure you don’t buy Bill’s moving and memorable thriller “Those who Trespass” because it contains some inappropriate passages.

Stripping off her bathing-suit, she walked into the huge shower. She pulled the lime green curtain across the entrance and then set the water for a tepid 75-degrees. The spray felt great against her skin as she ducked her head underneath the nozzle. Closing her eyes she concentrated on the tingling sensation of water flowing against her body. Suddenly another sensation entered. Ashley felt two large hands wrap themselves around her breasts and hot breathe on the back of her neck. She opened her eyes wide and giggled, "I thought you drowned out there snorkel man."

Tommy O'Malley was naked and at attention. "Drowning is not an option", he said, "unless of course you beg me to perform unnatural acts right here in this shower.

Merry Christmas!